NOTES

#0005 努力生活の瑪姬

Misunderstood often
but that’s ok, here I am.

I am Mag and I prioritize self-care
and organization

I enjoy giving back,
simple forward technology
and forever friendships

I am self-disciplined, spontaneous, and practical;
cheerful, polite, respectful but also cool, pitiless, and wise

I am a

at times shades of black,
at times lavenders and baby blues,
mini library of favorite mangas, novels and self-helps,

no-tv, no-bedframe,
white sheets (like sleeping on clouds),
white bath towels (reminiscent of 5 star hotels),

an old teddies, teddy gowns,
collages, themed parks and webcam selfies,

an old fashioned, journal and letter-writing,
plan for the long- long- term,
for peace, for private romance in life,

an honest, constant, refreshing, work smarter,
boyish, childlike
kind of girl.

.。髮箍 。.

#0003 New Venture

Hey ! I am excited to share my world with you! In the midst of trying to figure out WordPress blog, hosting, domains, all the technicalities on top of asking ‘what is my objective?’, ‘why am I doing this?’, ‘what is my bigger picture again?’…( If you’re a creative and highly sensitive person like me, you’d know how hard it is to ask such questions and then immediately surrender to the gods rather than depressing into self-doubt. It’s hard but I eventually learned! )…, I finally have my new website set up and it is as roughly handmade as can be because I am simply not too trained in the technical department. Though, rough patching and collaging is how my art has kind of emerged. If you look at my room, or how I put myself together, there’s no particular design or fashionable culture to it. In fact, I tend to freestyle and feel, it’s not necessarily ideal but it’s how I naturally create and play. It doesn’t mean I’m not attentive to details, or messy. I value order and refinement within my chaos, and it is only in this balance can I truly thrive. So I do try and learn the technicalities, it’s just not intuitive for me but I’m doing my best !

I’ve set up many homepages before (MTL Photography, Magna Lov, Rage In Cage, She Burns Of Velvet, Dreams And Vapours; the last is still active at this time of writing) at the previous stages of my creative journey. Each piece builds on the one prior, but so far all these experiments, which I have to remind myself are not failures, has helped me practice processing and refining and so given me insight on who I am. But this time, with OE, it feels completely different and refreshing. It has vision to back it up and with it, a humble desire to find and connect with its people, and I hope that means you. If it’s not, that’s totally alright. Sometimes it’s not meant to be, and I have to respect that! Thanks for giving me a chance anyway.

How KS Poetry came to be…

In my own search and meditative path, my passions emerged. Talking about passions seemed old fashioned, until I truly understood what it meant to me. Dance, Music, Writing are my Angels of Poetry. In the beginning of meeting with them, they felt foreign and terrifying. Part of being human is that I’d naturally carry insensible expectations, self-judgement and fear of failure in the face of the unknown. But I also gained the other side of this and it is being curious and excited about the possibilities of pursuing free dancing, musicianship, and authorship.

I needed to address the fire raging within that is still fearful and untamed. The work then, is to observe into existence my personal connection to my Angels. What makes a movement mine? What makes a voice pure? What is the story only I can write? How am I special? What must I do to contribute to the greater narrative? Necessary was relentlessly challenging myself with difficult existential inquiries, sitting bravely with deep sadness and unbearable anxiousness, subsiding anger with forgiveness, learning to welcome aloneness as my bestest friend and grief as my eternal lover. Somewhere within these growing pains, the soul that lives in my palace of mind, started to build my worldview (ie. mentality). It did so by growing conscious of the foundational – morality and humanity; and the fundamental – ethics and discipline.

I needed to free my soul from the weeds and distractions – the unhelpful information and conditioning that block or invalidate our creative potentials. I took to self-reflection and self-improvement in my inner sanctuary, the garden of that palace of mind. As a result of this work I continue to gain openness, clarity and gratitude, the peaceful energy which initiates the intelligence of nature (the force that births and sustains life itself, some call it God) to move my soul into the ideal of expressing a meaningful and purposeful life…to be resolved in creation.

And by this organic process, a vision would be expressed in my mind that would inspire me to create a world of my own, a world in which I can play and fall endlessly in love. This gave me strength to grow and nurture a voice, a movement, and a language that is original and exciting for me. As this world becomes my all, away sheds fear and shyness. I learned that I should not force, rush, or try to control, it always is counterproductive and worsens any circumstance. Gentleness and kindness is truly king.

Continuous, organic, creation is the energy I hope to pass on through my work. I hope this special world can become like a favourite theme park for you to freely visit and play in !! That’s what it is for me…

Welcome home! Thank you for being here.

Please enjoy KS WORLD ! ! ♡♡♡

#0002 Heavenly Tower

Today is another unknown beauty, a new beast…!

There it was, a slick fat crow in a well grown chinese pear tree… I admire it for a while then I continue my walk, seeing and feeling the openness that my heart is allowing for. Deep purple flowers lie low on the bed of wax green bush and my canine brushes it by… the edgeless clouds in the sky are up blending light into the pretty baby blue… A poetry comes to me about an endless stairway up a heavenly towering building. I talk it aloud, feeling as proud as the pear tree of my recent growth…

the heaven’s tower in the distance,
glowing, dimming,
with its windows all over,
glistening, reflecting the light of sun…

the tower pierces through
atmospheric layerings of white clouds.
up climbs the white stairs with white railings,
endless… in to the light of blues,
pretty to the eye and so promising…

legend (or myth) says that if you get to the top,
you can take flight and truly fly…
it takes an average person four hundred and sixty
five days to get to the top. that’s a year and
a hundred days.

when you are there, you are to dive into the infinity pool of white.
the angel of death will glide along your side,
it means no harm, just a gentle company,
it’ll introduce you to the heaven’s sirens.

purposefulness is dangerously alluring..
but as is purposelessness.
brave new wings and a gorgeous hell,
the legend promises…

but even from where I stand, I am cured
by the view of the heavenly tower
shooting through the majestic clouds.
I feel myself going within,
swimming, burning,
giving my soul
to free dancing…

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Heavenly Tower